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Welcome to my blog. I hope we can help each other endure the pain of the addiction of a daughter or son.

Sunday, December 27, 2009


Thanks to all of you for listening and commenting. I feel a little better today. My husband, youngest daughter and I flew to Arizona on Dec. 25. The trip was long but uneventful. Now we are out here with the cowboys in the  wild wild west.

My sister in law lent us her house and car just south of Tucson. My husband's family has been steadfast throughout this whole ordeal. They have never blamed us for Beth's addiction. They have always treated her kindly and given her every opportunity to start over.

At one point Beth lived in an apartment above their garage. She was very hostile to my husband and I  at that time. We thought and the Doctors told us that she had had a mental breakdown. It is interesting to note that they treated her for psychiatric problems but did not drug test her.

As it turns out she was dabbling with perscription drugs , marijuana and alchohol from the age of 16 onwards.
The rape occured when she snuck out of the house to party with some people she did not know well. They slipped her some kind of a drug and raped her. She has never really talked about it in detail. She has had the opportunity in therapy but says she does not remember much that the drug paralized her.  She never said a word about it until 4 years after the fact. In fact, it came out the first time she went to rehab.

At this point she seems to stay in rehab. The problem is that they are not set up for more than 30 days. No matter what they say or advertise it ends up being 30 days. They are very very good at getting the addicts turned around and positive that they can succeed. I just wish they would keep them longer.


  1. Dear Anna, My heart goes out to you. Your story is so familiar to me. Your daughter and mine have much in common. Thanks for sharing.

  2. I read this the other day but for some reason didn't comment. I am hoping your daughter can get the correct treatment, it makes all the difference (at least I keep telling myself that). Your in the state next door to me...say hi to the cactus and cowboys for me :)

    Thinking and praying for you and your daughter.

    PS I love the name of your blog, very fitting.

  3. My heart goes out to you too. It sounds like the trip to Arizona was a reprieve for you and it's nice to have supportive family members.

    I'm glad to hear she is in rehab - at least for now (???). We are trying to get my 19 year old daughter there - someday I pray! I read your other blog. We live in the state of Florida, and IF/WHEN she goes, Transformations is the one we have chosen. IF, when the time comes we have any say in the matter I suppose (to be realistic!)... Unfortunately for us, they are adults, these "babies" of ours we love so much and want to protect!!!

    God bless you.

  4. Rehab is at least a safe place. I too hope that she can get the medications that she needs. And the help that she needs to overcome the addiction.

  5. I was ganged raped while completely drunk at the age of 16. My life was out of control with sex, drugs, alcohol, clubbing, and I was so lost. Sometimes I wanted to tell my parents how awful it was, but I was afraid they would only be angry, and not give me the help I needed. Now that I am a mother of four daughters, I am so very different form my mom. But kids can still screw up, all by themselves, even if we do all the "right" things as I know you have seen.