Beth left a message on my cell phone today. She heard I was going to go to Florida and wanted me to know that she would sure like to come with me. She even offered to pay her own way.
My response was, " Someday we will travel together when you get a little more clean time. I would love, love, love to travel together. The first step would be for you to provide twice weekly drug tests to document your progress." There was no response from her which I take as positive as she has an amazing capacity for negative persistence.
As far as I know, she is still using crack. There is some possibility that she is not using heroine. I found her message quite disturbing. After giving it some thought, I think my response set boundaries without being cruel. I answered her via text which seems to deflect some of the begging and pleading which tend to occur on a phone call.
My response was, " Someday we will travel together when you get a little more clean time. I would love, love, love to travel together. The first step would be for you to provide twice weekly drug tests to document your progress." There was no response from her which I take as positive as she has an amazing capacity for negative persistence.
As far as I know, she is still using crack. There is some possibility that she is not using heroine. I found her message quite disturbing. After giving it some thought, I think my response set boundaries without being cruel. I answered her via text which seems to deflect some of the begging and pleading which tend to occur on a phone call.
I don't somehow think that it would be much of a vacation for you with Beth along at the moment. Sounds as if you just need a break.
ReplyDeleteWhen things got really bad with B I would only communicate through text messages for a couple of days. It helped that I didn't feel like I was shutting him out completely but you are so right it kept the begging and pleading to a minimum. A nice break for me.
ReplyDeleteI could not imagine taking a vacation with B when he was using.
I hope you have a very nice vacation and that one day soon Beth can join you.
Crack is so vile...
ReplyDeleteYou have learned to deal with it--her, addiction, the unbelievable shit that happens. We can be the suffering mom for just so long, and then they either get it..or not. I have gotten conditioned to having vacations ruined as they spring into their abandonment mode.
When will you be in Fla? We are going to check out Naples/Marco the end of March. Shoot me a email if you are there then, I'll buy you a latte;)
Thanks Lou,
ReplyDeleteI will be in Florida at the beginning of March. Too bad, it would have been great to meet up for that Latte. You said it well when you talk about that abandonment mode.
I hope you find a nice get away in Naples. It is a great area. I also like Fort Myers which is less expensive but still great.
Thanks Syd,
ReplyDeleteIt seems I need frequent breaks!
Torri,
Yes, I have to remember that using text helps take the emotion down a few notches. Thanks for that suggestion.
As the British say: Well done, you!
ReplyDelete