I broke down and texted Beth after the Earth Quake. She texted back that she got shook up pretty good but that it did not scare her. Nothing does scare her which is a big big problem.
She has been getting to Dr. Appointments and to the grocery store on her own. She gets rides. She can now walk without a walker.
None of the social service people that I called got back to me. That includes a medicaid case worker, PACT coordinator, the coordinator's supervisor and adult protective services.....????????????
I liked what a blogger wrote saying that we love who we love but sometimes we need some distance.
I have not been able to sleep since taking this position with Beth. I know I can not save her that is up to Beth and her own higher power. On the other hand, I do not want to add to her pain. Nor do I want her to add to mine. So, for now, I answer her texts but not so rapidly as to encourage 86 per day nor an overdependence on me which leads to my exhaustion and brittle nerves.
I will continue to try to find a case manager to work with her and someone else to be rep payee.
She has been getting to Dr. Appointments and to the grocery store on her own. She gets rides. She can now walk without a walker.
None of the social service people that I called got back to me. That includes a medicaid case worker, PACT coordinator, the coordinator's supervisor and adult protective services.....????????????
I liked what a blogger wrote saying that we love who we love but sometimes we need some distance.
I have not been able to sleep since taking this position with Beth. I know I can not save her that is up to Beth and her own higher power. On the other hand, I do not want to add to her pain. Nor do I want her to add to mine. So, for now, I answer her texts but not so rapidly as to encourage 86 per day nor an overdependence on me which leads to my exhaustion and brittle nerves.
I will continue to try to find a case manager to work with her and someone else to be rep payee.
You are in such a hard position. My prayers are with your family.
ReplyDeleteSounds as if you are balancing things as best you can for the time being. You do love her but also know that you have to be detached. It takes strength to do what you are doing. And faith.
ReplyDeleteIt's not funny, but your title made me smile..two disasters.
ReplyDeleteMy state has the same kind of social services. NONE. Why are these people getting paid with tax dollars. Any kind of help my son has gotten is because I called and called and raised hell till someone responded. There is no way he has the where with all to get help from the state or county agencies. You have to be pushy, persistent, and demanding.
From what I read here, you can move mountains if you have to. I'm the one voice who will not tell you that is enabling. You are putting the tools in place, just in case Beth ever decides to use them.
Amen to what Lou said.
ReplyDeleteI don't know what state you are in, but I would love to help with the benefits and payee. If you want to email me at : kelrish@aol.com, I will try to help you as much as I can. I will tell you this, the squeeky wheel gets the job done! But, it's exhausting and almost fruitless if Beth is not on board. But, let's see if I can find some resources for you, if you want. Hugs, Kelly
ReplyDeleteThat's so maddening that none of those agencies got back to you! Have you every looked up your local chapter of NAMI? I don't know if they'd be much help.
ReplyDeleteI hope you are able to get some sleep soon, you need it and you deserve it. Stay strong, you're a good mother who is doing what's best under the circumstances, no matter how heartbreaking it may feel. I admire you.
I am sorry you are having such a hard time. It has been my experience that Social Services (on various levels) tend to "help" those who actually can help themselves and neglect those who are in the most need. I hope you find some peace and resolution in the near future.
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