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Welcome to my blog. I hope we can help each other endure the pain of the addiction of a daughter or son.

Saturday, August 6, 2011

Pain Returns Full Force

I drove out to Beth's apartment this morning where her sugar daddy was supposed to be taking care of her. The neighbors ran out to greet me saying that they heard her screaming in pain. They wanted to know why she was there without a nurse.

She had no perscriptions and no dischcarge papers. Only the preliminary reports that I fought so hard to get 2 days earlier. The apartment was in such squalor that it is hard to describe. There was a crack pipe and heroin needles along with lots of blood spots in the bathroom. She got out of bed to answer the door. She had the neck brace off but the body cast on. She was gasping for breath and throwing up. She had tried to use the walker to help her get up out of bed but the wheels rolled and she fell down.


Is this the part where I was supposed to let her deal with the consequences of her own actions?

 In a way I wanted to but I was afraid it could result in paralysis. I had to get the place clean enough for a health care worker to take the case. I knew that the addiction had her by the throat and that the mental illness was not being treated for months.


 Would you have left any human being much less a child of your own in these conditions to fend for herself? She lost 10 % of her height due to the crushing down of her vertabrae.



13 comments:

  1. No I would not have left her there in that condition. Anna, we have to be able to live with ourselves. All we can do is the best we can at any given moment. It sounds like that is what you are doing. There are no easy answers or formulas. I am praying honey. My heart really goes out to you.

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  2. I would have helped her as you did. And I would have asked to speak with someone at the hospital about the lack of discharge papers and medication. Having a health care person in sounds like a really good idea. You did the humane caring thing.

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  3. No I could not have left her. You are dealing with something that would be difficult for any Parent, times 100 because addiction is in there and a mental illness? I never could have just left. I will pray that she gets a nurse in there very fast.

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  4. Of course you did what you should do. I'm praying for you both.

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  5. No I would not have left her and you don't have to explain anything to anyone. Can she not receive disability now? Would that get her into an apartment with a health aid? I am praying for you both. Is the any state agency that can be called in to help with her care?

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  6. The hospital was wrong, is the first thing. Doesn't she have Medicare disability? I thought you wrote that once. Even if she had no insurance, she should not have been discharged home. The only reason I can think this was done was if Beth herself left AMA. In that case, the hospital could not be held responsible.

    Secondly, who would leave someone in her condition to fend for herself. Not ANY mother I know! Funny (not), how we have to feel guilty about "enabling" if it's our kid, but if we did that for a neighbor or another relative we would be compassionate heroes.

    Hang in there, Anna, you are showing us just how strong you are..

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  7. This is so heartbreaking to read. I am glad you were able to help her. She does not have much of a chance of healing if she has no support.

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  8. I would be there for my child and do all that I could. This is heartbreaking to read Anna! Beth must be in terrible physical pain and all of this has to be horrible for you as well. I hope she has been able to get some help!! She never should have been discharged!!

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  9. Oh Anna, Its so sad that her life has come to this...I would find out if she left AMA (if they will tell you) and try to get someone to see that this young lady needs care and MEDS. I would probably have her semi-sedated for awhile just to keep her from hurting herself further and to get a chance to rest. It seems like her mind and body are both screaming out in pain and she needs to get off this roller coaster into a safe healthy environment....but what can you do if she doesn't want that? Kidnap her? I am so very sorry, I would be a basket case. You are strong but you must hurt so much inside. Hang in there, sweet Anna.

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  10. Sending prayers your way. I don't know what to say. The situation is so sad.

    God Bless

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  11. I just get chills ( in this humidy we r having) reading this. I just can't imagine being in this situation. I have no answers for you..I can only offer some maybe comfort with my thoughts and prayers for you. Tragic. How do you work thru the trama of something like this? I don't know. Given her situation, which is extreme, I wonder if you could get legal custody of her. Get her away from sugar daddy and take over her duel rehab she needs? ((Hugs)) Kelly

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  12. OMG that is my reaction to reading the past few posts. Unbelievable. It is a miracle she isn't paralyzed (like my nephew was in April in a car accident) or dead. I am so, so sorry. I wish I could be there to take your out to coffee, just hold your hand as you struggle through what it means to love Beth in these circumstances. It is not right that she is at home so quickly, not in that much pain, so soon after the accident. She needs to be in rehab or something. I pray that the addiction will be broken.

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  13. I am thinking of you. There are no other words. Please take care of yourself while you go through this difficult time with Beth.

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