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Welcome to my blog. I hope we can help each other endure the pain of the addiction of a daughter or son.

Friday, June 11, 2010

Off the Couch

After three very intense days on the couch and seething mad most of the time, Beth seems a lot better. She is riding her bike, talking a little, making good sense and attending to her hygiene. It seems to have taken three whole days of taking the meds as perscribed.

The Doctor was just about to give her another  antipsychotic and then  she started getting better. I finally asked her tonight why she was not taking her meds regularly. She has skipped nine doses. She said that it was not 9 in a row but that she would forget if she slept at her girlfriends or if she did not put the meds on the table.

I went through this with my son with ADD. He really wanted to take his meds when he was younger. There was no coercion involved but he would sometimes forget. The very frustrating thing (really it is logical if you think about it) was that if he forgot once, he would be much more likely to forget again. The medication itself helped his memory. Without it, he was much more likely to forget.

  Soo, I will lay it out for her on her table each night. After awhile if she seems more stable I will put it in one of those day by day containers. With her, it is even more critical. I notice that if she forgets for a couple of days then she does not even want to take it. We have learned that it is best not to even try talking to her when she is off meds.

I so want to keep her home and just watch her 24/7. If only, she would submit to such treatment we could give her the gift of 6 months or so clean under our care but she is very sensitive to be controlled. Even as a child she was very sensitive to being controlled. She would obey but she would seethe with resentment unless you could explain to her why. I am sure that being raped was an even greater trauma for this girl who values her own free spirit so much. I admired this trait in her. I thought it would serve her well.

Josh is working a double shift tonight and Dave is sick again. First his back for weeks at a time and now he seems to have the flu. Joy and I just got done looking a bunch of pictures of my husband and I from high school. We were all hippied out with love beads and bell bottoms! Those were the days that we were out to change the world!


  1. Good idea to put her meds out, whatever it takes to keep them remembering! I tried one of those day to day things for Keven but he has to take them a few times a day and the dr. changes them so much I gave up. I think he is pretty good about taking them.

    I would LOVE to see pics of you in your hippy clothes! :)

  2. I thought that the less spoken about remembering or forgetting the meds, the less likely we were to have an altercation. So, wordlessly, I put them in a little bowl at the top of the stairs every morning and night. This routine worked for awhile. It was easy and she just took them. I put them into a weekly, day-slotted container AM and PM so I wouldn't forget. I, unfortunately, also had to hide them because she was taking things she could and would use to OD. My heart is racing as I am writing this. Obviously, I haven't dealt with all the baggage from that period of time.
    Consistently taking the meds is the only way of knowing if they are really working. It takes time to get to a therapeutic dose.
    Hippy clothes! I used to be a ballet dancer. There is a snapshot of me getting onto a tour bus with PLAID bellbottoms that are the most ugly ridiculous pair of pants you could possibly conjure up in your mind. They went from skin-tight, hip-hugging down to huge cuffs that were frayed. I probably had on some kind of platform shoes and they were still too long. There is only a sliver of my face showing through a curtain of long blonde hair. Round hippy glasses on the guy who I have my arm around (WHO was that?).
    Have we come a long way? I wonder about the direction. Could I have made significantly different choices and be living another life?
    Probably not. I am who I am. Still. There were moments.
    xx kris

  3. The pill box with the days is a great idea. I use 2 myself, one for morning and one for night. I have ADD medications for myself to take each day - and if I don't have them OUT WHERE I CAN SEE them - I forget! I have to take 2 a half hour apart - and I often forget the second one.
    With Beth's medications being so critical I think it is a great idea for you to help her with them while she is there. I'd just see it as helping yourself - It's actually to make YOUR life better with her moods stabilized :)
    Glad to hear you had some fun time with Joy.
    God bless.

  4. Sounds like a good idea about the meds. I like the idea of going through those old photos. Those were the days.