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Welcome to my blog. I hope we can help each other endure the pain of the addiction of a daughter or son.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Big Day Tomorrow

Tomorrow Beth will go to the suboxone Dr. at 4. I will meet her there and she will be drug tested. We will see if the suboxone is in her system and what else is there as well. I am not sure if we will see the results right at the office or in a day. I stopped by the Dr office today. I told her that Beth is staying with a very heavy user. This much she admits to. Even if by some miracle she is not doing heroine right now, it is not a healthy place where she can stay clean.

Tom from recovery helpdesk is supposed to talk with Beth on the phone at 1. I will be surprised if she picks up but she said that she would. I finally told my husband all about this. It started just before he left with dd2 for the weekend.

He was a big help in getting my emotions back in the box. You know what I mean don't you?. I mean not exactly where my emotions are not hurting me but out of sight, somewhat organized and contained.

Beth was going to work with a life coach as well but today she told me that she does not need anymore counselling. Did I mention that she told me she is shooting water into her neck because she misses the needle but she is not doing crack or heroine?

I am trying to detach with love at this point. I have to create some distance to protect my sanity and my ability to sleep, work and interact like a somewhat normal person.


  1. I hate reading the things we and our children go through because of drugs.

    I truly hope she is not using. I guess you will find out soon enough.

    My thoughts and prayers are with you.

  2. I knew several addicts who shot water, just because they missed the needle. I knew one that even got clean that way, eventually weaning himself off the water, too. But, to someone on the seems crazy and foreign, not to mention dangerous. The problem with it is that it generally produces more cravings, rather than satisfying them.

  3. Oh Anna (((HUG))) I am so sorry. We are here, that's all I have to offer. That and prayers being said for you and your girl.

  4. I know what you mean about getting emotions into a neat little box so you could function in your life. God help anyone who was around when that lid would explode off the box. I really hope Suboxone will be her miracle. It can be for many...

  5. Anna,

    I will be praying for you and your daughter.

    I liked the "emotions in a box" comment. I will remember that.

    Thanks for sharing with us.

  6. I cannot imagine shooting water into my neck. I am hopeful that things will go better for you and for Beth soon.